Before mastodon: It doesn't matter what instance you choose! They're all good and they're all friends
After joining mastodon: your entire instance is riddled with spiders and needs to be burned on sight
Tempted to roll my own server just to avoid the drama
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It's not terribly tough. Getting our email server hooked up properly and Amazon S3 communicating via the right bucket policy took some fiddling, but that's probably just bc I'm dumb. A droplet on Digital Ocean was a one-click install to get things rolling.
